For many children of immigrants, the journey to PA school is more than just an individual pursuit. It’s a reflection of their family, their culture, and everything their parents sacrificed to give them a shot at success. Whether your family struggled or has established themselves well in the United States, one truth remains: you don’t have the luxury of failure. The pressure to succeed, to excel, and to represent your family with honor can be overwhelming.
In immigrant families—whether well-off or still finding their footing—how you present yourself to the world matters. You’re often seen as a reflection of your family and culture, and the stakes feel much higher. Let’s be real: you can’t afford to stumble.
So, how do you balance these cultural expectations with the unrelenting demands of PA school? How do you handle the burden of being a representative of your heritage while navigating one of the most challenging career paths?
Here’s some real, raw advice for getting through it.
Failure Is Not an Option—But It Can Happen
In many immigrant families, failure isn’t seen as a stepping stone—it’s seen as an embarrassment. Your family might not say it outright, but you know that the stakes are high. Any misstep feels like not just a personal failure but a failure of your entire family’s legacy. Whether your parents struggled or thrived, they carry the weight of wanting to see you succeed and bring honor to the family.
The truth is, failure can happen, and it’s important to recognize that it’s part of the process. You’re going to face setbacks in PA school—it’s inevitable. The key is to redefine what failure means. It’s not the end of the road, and it doesn’t have to define your worth or your family’s. It’s a challenge to overcome.
Practical Tip: Give yourself room to fall short without seeing it as the ultimate failure. Setbacks in PA school don’t mean you’re dishonoring your family. It just means you’re human, and every student—immigrant or not—faces them.
You Are Representing More Than Yourself—And That’s a Heavy Burden
When you’re a child of immigrants, your success is often seen as a testament to your family’s work ethic, culture, and values. This can be a powerful motivator, but it can also be an exhausting burden. Every time you step into a classroom, a clinical setting, or even just interact with peers, you feel like you’re representing not just yourself, but your entire culture.
While this pressure can drive you to push harder, it’s important to recognize that you can’t carry the weight of an entire culture on your shoulders. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. Your worth isn’t solely tied to how perfectly you represent your family.
Practical Tip: Focus on your individual journey. It’s okay to take pride in your culture, but remember that you’re allowed to make mistakes and grow from them—just like anyone else.
There’s No Room for Weakness—But You Can’t Do It All Alone
One common thread among children of immigrants is the sense that there’s no room to show weakness. You may feel pressure to always be strong, to always push through, because showing vulnerability could be seen as a weakness that reflects badly on your family. But the truth is, nobody can do this alone. PA school is tough, and the mental and emotional toll is real.
It’s okay to ask for help, whether from classmates, mentors, or mental health professionals. You don’t have to carry this entire journey on your own. You can still be strong and resilient while acknowledging that you need support.
Practical Tip: Find a support system outside of your family—whether it’s friends, other PA students, or even professional help. Just because your family may expect you to “handle it” doesn’t mean you have to go through PA school in isolation.
You Don’t Have the Luxury of Time, So Manage It Ruthlessly
Many immigrant parents instill a strong sense of discipline and hard work in their children. But when you’re balancing school, family obligations, and cultural expectations, time becomes your most precious resource. There’s no time to waste, and you can’t afford to fall behind.
Be ruthless with your time management. You may not have the luxury of a traditional social life or endless study hours. That’s the reality. But you can make the most of the time you do have by being efficient and focused.
Practical Tip: Set up non-negotiable study times and boundaries around family and social obligations. You may have to say no more often than you’re comfortable with, but protecting your time is crucial to surviving PA school.
Your Family Might Never Understand the Pressure—But That’s Okay
One of the hardest truths for children of immigrants to accept is that your parents might never fully understand the pressure you’re under. To them, you’re already living their dream—you’re in school, you’re on track for a prestigious career, and they might not grasp the emotional toll of PA school or the weight of their expectations.
And that’s okay. You don’t need their full understanding to succeed. Your journey is different from theirs, and the challenges you face are unique to your time and place in the world.
Practical Tip: Let go of the need for your parents’ validation. It’s hard, but freeing yourself from that need can give you the mental space to focus on your own goals. You’re not failing them by prioritizing your mental health and your career—you’re honoring them by thriving on your own terms.
Success Is Not Optional—But Define It on Your Own Terms
For many children of immigrants, there’s an unspoken belief that success is the only acceptable outcome. But here’s the thing: you get to define what success looks like. It doesn’t have to be about getting the highest grades or the most prestigious clinical placement. Success can mean finishing PA school on your own terms, finding a balance between your family’s expectations and your own needs, and staying true to yourself in the process.
Practical Tip: Take control of your narrative. You are the one living this life, not your family or your culture. Define what success looks like to you, and don’t let external pressures dictate how you measure your own achievements.
Final Thoughts: Thriving Under Pressure, Not Just Surviving
As the child of immigrants, you’ve been raised with a sense of pride, duty, and responsibility. Those values have driven you to pursue a demanding career in PA school, but they’ve also placed immense pressure on you. It’s okay to feel the weight of those expectations—it’s part of your journey.
But remember, while you may not have the luxury of failure, you also don’t have to sacrifice your mental health or sense of self to meet those expectations. You are not just surviving PA school; you are thriving under pressure. And that’s the real success.
